When the Backpacks Are Gone

 

Back-to-school season is upon us, and I have to admit… 

my heart feels a little nostalgic. 

Being an empty nester during this time of year brings back so many memories. I miss the school shopping trips, the excitement of finding the coolest school supplies, picking out new clothes, and putting together those first-day outfits. I miss watching the kids try everything on, modeling their new clothes for us, and doing their little runway walks through the house. 

I miss those first-day-of-school pictures, even when getting everyone ready for them was chaotic. I miss the conversations when they walked through the door after school, hearing about their day, their friends, their teachers, and whatever happened that seemed like the most important thing in the world at that moment.

I miss the school plays, sports, activities, projects, events, and all the little things that filled our calendar and our home. I even miss the craziness of it all.

Truthfully, I miss it all.

But there is another side to this empty-nest chapter that I have come to appreciate so much.

I get to know my husband all over again. 

For so many years, our lives revolved around working, raising a family, keeping up with schedules, and making sure everyone else was taken care of. Somewhere along the way, there were probably conversations we never had and things we never had the time to discover about one another.

Now we have time.

Time to talk. Time to laugh. Time to discover new hobbies and make new memories. Time to simply enjoy being together without always having somewhere to be or someone who needs us.

And I've realized something beautiful along the way: we're not just husband and wife. We're best friends. We're two people who get to grow old together, experience new seasons of life together, and watch the children we poured so much of ourselves into build lives of their own.

And now, we get to watch them raise our grandchildren. 

Would I go back and do it all again?

In a heartbeat.

I miss the full house. I miss the noise, the mess, the laughter, the busy schedules, and all those little moments that I didn't realize would one day become memories I treasured so deeply.

But I'm also learning to embrace this quieter chapter.

The house may be calmer now, but my heart is still full.

Sometimes empty nesting isn't about losing the life you knew. It's about making room for a beautiful new chapter, one filled with memories of the past, love for the present, and excitement for whatever comes next.

And as another school year begins, I'll probably shed a few tears for the days gone by… while being incredibly grateful that I got to live them. 

One Question a Day for couples.

This post may contain affiliate links. Read my disclosure policy here. 

 Our lives from the beginning were all about our children but now we are officially empty nesters. Even after almost 35 years together we still learn something new about each other almost daily. The journal, One Question a Day to Stay Close & Curious, A Couple's Journal for a Lifetime of Love by Gina Senarighi is a great book for new couples at any time during their relationship. Actually, this would be nice to do at the beginning of a marriage and then updated throughout the marriage to see how the responses might differ over time.

Our marriage has always been pretty strong but it took work. We have had our lows, highs, and tons of twists and turns over the years. We only had a short time of being a couple before children started coming along and even though we took time for date nights regularly we always found ourselves talking about our children. Not much has changed but not every living minute is about our children now.

Now we are filling in all of the little details and learning more about each other. For instance, when Easter came around I knew my husband always liked his big solid chocolate Easter Bunny which was always in his basket growing up and I know he loves pretty much anything Reese's but other than that he always got what our children got. I didn't really know his favorite candies. These are conversations we have now.

Yes, most of our lives are still taken up with our children and grandchildren but we are discovering new things about each other every day. This journal takes us to places where we might not have taken the time to talk or write about but now we have a space for them. There are many we have spoken to each other about but have never taken the time to actually write down in words that we could come back and read at a later time or leave for our children to read when we are gone.

 

For me being diagnosed with 3rd Stage Colon Cancer was a big eye-opener. My whole life had revolved around my family which is not a bad thing, but I really never took time for myself other than a bath while reading, and that was OK, but now that I have time there are things I want to still do in my lifetime and that includes staying close to my husband and leaving something behind for our children. Money, we don't have but knowledge that I can do.

If you are interested in this book check it out below.